Monday, November 27, 2006

A Very Sad time for me

I have just had a brilliant weekend on UKS the cyber crop took place and of course the winning team was Slytherin it was a very close match between ourselves and the hufflepuffs but through shear determination we pull the broom from under them. i was pleased that i managed to complete 4 LOs and a mini book, went to bed a happy person, to get up at 7 o'clock to go to work, to a not so happy phone message that was left at 5 o'clock this morning from my Uncle, to inform me that my nan was dying, so of course i went into complete panic, rang the hospital, to find that she had passed at quarter past 5!

I am so upset that i was unable to get to say goodbye. I knew she was in hospital and had phoned every other day to find out how she was doing, she had requested not to have visitors so i respected that - very independent lady was my nanny, now i wish that i hadn't, i know that she has gone to a much better place and that she will be fine, no more aliments or pain, its me that i am crying for, for my selfishness that she isn't here for me anymore, to give me advice or comfort or for just being my nanny so i will say it here, I love you nanny, goodbye for now as i know i will see you again X ............ am sorry for posting this but i thought it might help me in some therapeutic way, not sure how as i am bawling!

TTFN

8 comments:

Elinor said...

Oh Gaye, I'm so sorry to hear about your Nan :( ((Hugs))

Craftybanshee said...

So sorry to hear about your Nan's passing Gaye :-( Sending you cyber {{{hugs}}}

Nat said...

Oh Gaye I'm so sorry to hear about your Nan. What you're feeling is totally natural and not selfish in anyway. Thinking of you, big hugs xxxxx

Beth said...

Oh Gaye, Very sorry to hear of your Nan's passing. It's a huge shock and you must feel what you want to feel, there's no bad or guilt in it at all. Here if you wanna shoulder to cry on. Thinking of you. Beth XX

Anonymous said...

Aww Gaye {{{Huge Huggles}}}I'm so sorry to hear your sad news. But like the previous comments state, there is no way you should feel guilty for how you feel! It is a perfectly natural part of the grieving process. Hope you are okies, lots of love ~*Gems*~ xxx

Di said...

Oh Gosh Gaye, I am so sorry to hear about your Nan.

Please don't feel selfish or guilty, as everyone has said, what you're feeling is a normal part of grieving.

Sending you lots of hugs. xx

{ Positivity } said...

Gaye I'm thinking of you. Sending you my love. Kerry xxx

Anonymous said...

Oh Gaye hunny, haven't been blogging for a while - just seen this. Big (((((hugs))))) it's so hard when you lose someone close. You cry girl, it will help, and slowly you'll cry a little less and be able to cope better. Thinking of you. Donna xxx